How to Ask a Girl Out: Tips for the Uninitiated

If you wonder how to ask a girl out, forget some of the bad examples set by popular culture.  Read on instead for some useful tips.

The first thing you need to do is to muster the courage to ask her out.  The prospect of rejection can be terrifying, but if you don’t ask her out, you may regret it for the rest of your life.  Believe in yourself and take that leap of faith.  It will be an enriching experience, whether she agrees to go out with you or not.

There’s still the part of the actual asking out.  Give adequate thought to the way you want to put the question across.  For all you clueless ones out there, we present:

Seven ways to ask a girl out

1. The Classic

Candlelight dinner
Tara Angkor Hotel

Asking her if you can buy her dinner or if you can take her to a movie is a time-tested technique that often works like a charm.  You are merely expressing your intentions to hang out and get to know her better.  First be sure, though, that you have not activated her creep radar.   If she’s a mere acquaintance, it may help to refresh her memory on when you both met or last interacted.  Reminding her would instill a sense of familiarity and also give you something to talk about at the beginning.

Be authentic; don’t fake it like Ben Affleck in Good Will Hunting and contrive an awkward situation:


2. The Cheesy 

Cheesy ways to proclaim your love
Samrah Shahid

You might want to avoid those one-liners on pyaar canonized in Bollywood.  Cue Aditya Roy Kapoor in Aashiqui 2: Yeh zindagi chal toh rahi thi… par tere aane se maine jeena shuru kiya.  Which roughly translates to “Before you came into my life, I was merely existing.  Now that you’re here, I have begun living life.”   If you insist on some cheesiness, and yes, nothing is too cheesy, think independently.  It doesn’t have to be an absolutely out-of-the-box idea but if it’s your own, you can at least be sure that you won’t be messing it up while saying or doing it.  If it falls flat, you might as well laugh about it with her.


3. The Romantic

Another way to get the message across

Contrary to popular belief, heart-shaped, pink-colored pillows, flowers, and dolls are not the only things romantic.  Put the man in romantic by doing something special and sweet.  You can ask her out by playing or singing a popular song.  If you find that too cliched, you can offer to take her out to dinner at the most romantic restaurant in town.  If you want to go the extra mile, you might want to ping some of her friends or your mutual friends and find out her favorite food and give her a pleasant surprise.  Moreover, a bottle of ketchup and an empty plate may also help you get the message across.


4. The Two-Step Rule

Ram Balmur
Ram Balmur

It might be so that you have fallen in love at first sight but remember that even Rahul from Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge did not ask Simran out on the very first day they had met.  Many a time, relationships develop from friendships.  Getting to know her and becoming close to her will make you more comfortable and confident to ask her out.  Just as importantly, she’ll be more comfortable about the prospect of that, too.


5. The Tactical 

Harsha K.R.
Harsha K.R.

Then there is the offbeat approach whereby you catch the girl off guard with an unexpected question or remark and wait until the conversation boils down to the exact response you wanted to hear from her.  If you are a witty guy, you might bowl someone over with a joke.

Kind of like Rajesh Khanna Sr. did in Aradhana:


6. The Written 

Love letter
Peter Hellberg

A written proposal is the safest bet for those who are not comfortable with meeting the girl face-to-face and asking her out, but it is not just that.  It has an old-school charm and is classy.  A simple, yet personal message on a card or a note might get you instant brownie points.  If you know that the girl loves poetry, you might want to try your hand at a shaayar or a poem.  Need some inspiration? Read: The Writing of a Love Letter


7. The Honest 

Be honest
Harsha K.R.

Beating around the bush might save you from getting into trouble for not doing something but it might not always work towards your favor when you have to ask your crush out.  Being brutally honest and asking her if she would like to go out with you not only saves you the trouble of having to gloss things up, but also makes you come across as an authentic, no-nonsense person, which has its own charm.


Featured image courtesy of Nikos Roussos

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Abhinand Shankar

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