{"id":1535,"date":"2016-07-08T08:04:29","date_gmt":"2016-07-08T02:34:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.jodi365.com\/singledout\/?p=1535"},"modified":"2020-10-28T16:01:12","modified_gmt":"2020-10-28T10:31:12","slug":"how-long-to-deal-with-heartbreak-and-get-over-failed-relationship","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jodi365.com\/singledout\/how-long-to-deal-with-heartbreak-and-get-over-failed-relationship\/","title":{"rendered":"How long does it take to deal with heartbreak and get over a failed relationship"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Someone online asked,\u00a0\u201cHow long did it take for you to feel like you could date again after losing someone that broke your heart?\u201d \u00a0This is how I feel compelled to respond:<\/p>\n<p>I have known heartbreak in the past, on more than one occasion. \u00a0It was painful emotionally, even seemingly physically. \u00a0If you\u2019re asking because you\u2019ve recently experienced heartbreak, I feel for you. \u00a0Take comfort, as I did, in such words:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u201cWhat doesn\u2019t kill you makes you stronger.\u201d<br \/>Cliched, yes, but there\u2019s some merit to the statement. \u00a0It made <em>me<\/em> less afraid of things that could go wrong in life. \u00a0(\u201cHey, I dealt with <em>that<\/em> and came out OK. \u00a0Why should I fear this now?\u201d) \u00a0The downside is that my poor wife thinks I can be unemotional (unfazed is how I\u2019d prefer to see it!) and robotic at times.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>\u201cSuccess isn\u2019t <em>not falling<\/em>; it is the act of getting back up after a fall.\u201d<br \/>We are shaped by our experiences and what we learn from them. \u00a0Learn what lessons there may be to learn from this experience and be positive.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>\u201cTime heals all wounds.\u201d<br \/>In the wake of a heartbreak, in my mid-to-late-20s, I read that it takes about as long to get over heartbreak as the length of the relationship. \u00a0I remember wondering whether it would take someone 5 long years, say, to get over a failed 5-year-long relationship and doubted the linearity of the formula. \u00a0In any case, that failed relationship of mine lasted only a year-and-a-half and it helped to think that I would likely see light at the end of the tunnel eventually.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Let me volunteer more information so that it may provide additional support and comfort:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Deeply invested emotionally as I was into the relationship, I tried hard to get her back. \u00a0It worked, briefly, but only for the relationship to sputter along for some more weeks and die. \u00a0That the end was final became clear to me.<\/p>\n<p>Human as I was, my instinct was to fill the sudden gaping hole in my heart and to feel loved again. \u00a0Resist the urge to do that. \u00a0It would be what is referred to as a rebound. \u00a0Rebound relationships aren\u2019t built on the right foundation.<\/p>\n<p>Take your time to heal, to reflect on your failed relationship, and to grow (continually) into a better, wiser person. \u00a0When the right person comes along, fall in love because of what you see in them (as it should be), not because of your need for reciprocal love.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Let me end with this:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>To love is to give your heart to someone. \u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.jodi365.com\/singledout\/10-signs-that-you-are-in-love\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Being in love<\/a> is a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.jodi365.com\/singledout\/the-path-of-love\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">wonderful feeling<\/a>. \u00a0To know love again, though, you have to be prepared to be vulnerable again, despite knowing that you might have to deal with\u00a0heartbreak again. \u00a0I would hope that, when the time feels right, you would be open to loving and to be loved again.<\/p>\n<p>Be at peace.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0<\/p>\n<p><em><a href=\"http:\/\/www.anil-kumar.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">Anil Kumar<\/a> is the founder and CEO of Jodi365.com. \u00a0He tweets, occasionally, <a href=\"http:\/\/www.twitter.com\/aktxt\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">@aktxt<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>\u00a0<\/p>\n<p><em>Image: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/csb13\/5833077880\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">Chris Blakeley\/Flickr<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n<p>Editor&#8217;s note:<br>Here are additional <a href=\"https:\/\/www.jodi365.com\/singledout\/tips-dealing-with-breakups\/\" target=\"_blank\" aria-label=\"undefined (opens in a new tab)\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">tips on dealing with heartbreak<\/a>.<\/p>\n<div style=\"margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px;\" class=\"sharethis-inline-share-buttons\" ><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Someone online asked,\u00a0\u201cHow long did it take for you to feel like you could date again after losing someone that broke your heart?\u201d \u00a0This is how I feel compelled to respond: I have known heartbreak in the past, on more than one occasion. \u00a0It was painful emotionally, even seemingly physically. \u00a0If you\u2019re asking because you\u2019ve [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":25,"featured_media":1537,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1535","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-relationships"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v25.3.1 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How long does it take to deal with heartbreak and get over a failed relationship | SingledOut by Jodi365.com<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Time heals all wounds, it is said. 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